my perfect,
i want to smile,
can’t remember how,
i haven’t for awhile.

i hate myself,
but i love myself,
it’s a constant battle,
i can’t win.

i hear the voices
im not enough
i try and try
to call their bluff
but are they wrong?

sometimes i lay and wonder
whats wrong with me?

so sometimes i cry,
i want to die,
even though deep down i don’t.

i take the lighter to my skin,
and cheat the battle i cant win.

and welcome stranger,
into the mind,
and life of finn.

jic you couldnt tell what this porm was about, its about my experiences with depression, but the thing is i cant really “get my depression under control” since its caused by lack of chemicals in my brain, not really something i can change. so its a constant battle with my lack of serotonin and sometimes it gets to me. i dont self harm anymore, but i used to a lot. so this was my way of bringing awareness to clincal depression caused by lack of serotonin. remember that theres some things therapy cant cure. and for me, thats my depression. no matter how many worksheets or how much talking i do, i always end up hating myself and having this really bad suicidal ideation and ill never go through with trying it again but its hard to live in a constant battle in your head, which i really cant fucking win. but yeah, hope you enjoyed this poem <33

i got to see my band friends and everything, im gonna miss all of my senior friends. i spent time with my boyfriend, i got to show and tell him how much i love him all night since we’re both busy most of the time, we got waffle house after and he slept over at my house. my photos came out great, my makeup was good like everything was perfect imo. i did take my heels off about an hour in and i just wore flipflops

i hate when people do this shit. like if i block someone thats not an invitation to bother me about why, cause if i block you, you most likely know why. or if they ask you to ask me yo unblock them or try to send messages through you, that shit annoys me and ill block you too. blocking is my way of keeping my inner peace, and if they complain then they can whine about it.

same here, i’m so excited to go

me when the recent reply thing on the side

and still pretty