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A lot of people blame themselves for the bad things that happen to them in life. And I know people tell them otherwise, but of course it’s kind of hard to just believe. One of the most difficult things to get over is self-blame. It’s not something you can just learn in a 12 step program, nor something that clicks after you are told for the 10th time, “Don’t blame yourself.” It is something you have to learn to accept over time.
The Loss of a Loved One
Self-blame can torment people for decades. People who suffer from survivor’s guilt can go their entire lives feeling bad that they even exist. That’s how horrifying self-blame can be. Maybe that’s worst case scenario, but it’s real, and it hurts. There are people who have the guilt of not saving their friend from suicide. I’ve met way too many people online who have told me that their friend committed suicide, and the guilt is unfathomable. The death of someone else is not in your control. Life happens. Bad situations happen. But the world doesn’t work in a way that we can 100% control how it leads. You can try to convince someone considering suicide to not go that rout the best you can, but it is not on your soul or conscious if they do not heed your warnings and pleads. It might feel like you didn’t do enough, but be real with yourself, my friend. Sometimes there’s nothing that can do to convince someone enough to value their life. And just because you are their friend doesn’t mean you didn’t do enough so they feel valued. Some people don’t want to accept life-valuing actions/words because they just devalue themselves that much. If someone doesn’t accept your help, guidance, advice, or kindness, as cold at it is, there’s nothing you can do. It is on that person and that person alone to let you in. As hard as it is to accept, people go through stuff for so long that one friend isn’t enough to turn around a lifetime of depression. So don’t put that responsibility on yourself. You can help them by being as kind and gentle as you can, but do not expect yourself to be someone’s savior. I advise people to still try their best to help a friend in need, but if you can’t save them from their dark mental state, remember that when you do your best, you shouldn’t beat yourself up that you couldn’t do more. Sometimes the best isn’t enough, and that is not your fault. -
@Duchess therapist mother vibes, but i do agree with this post,
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@TheRingMaster
Same
Duchess is the mother of mppc -
Shinra Kusakabe mommy?/jk/jk/jk/jk/jk
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@TheRingMaster
THE HECK ITS THE MODERTARR HECCK NOO NOT EVEN I WOULD
SAY THAG TO THE MOD -
@TheRingMaster Don’t. Go down that path.
We beg of you -
o .o
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@Duchess hi
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@izzy-lolll Hello :)
@Mother There are some points that we are to blame for things. Like when we should own up to our mistakes and stuff. -
@Mother Have you even blamed others for your mistakes…?
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@Mother Uh…okay.
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