I'm sorry if I'm on edge and rude today

[A Former User]

A character from Murder Drones said this, as it’s quoted in Enzi’s signature…
(@Merry)
And to be honest? I agree with it because it’s how I am. I don’t mean to act the way I am, it’s just me. And if you think of me negatively for it and thing I’m a bad person, I’m sorry. But I’m just not going to bend to your will and be nicer because you asked me to. I try, I really do, but I’m so easy to irritate, I don’t mean a lot of the things I say sometimes because I’m just irritated, upset, angry. Like I always usually am.

And I really can’t help it. I heard that one can gain personality traits from their parents even if they’ve been raised the opposite way.
My father is an angry alcoholic, always upset by something, always irritated, always yelling.
It doesn’t make it any better he’s who I’m raised by, or that I’m always suppressing myself even when people tell me to open up to them.

The internet is a comfort for me, I suppose. Because I can vent here; because I can’t vent about these things to people without being an ugly stuttering mess that can’t even fucking talk right or form thoughts correctly because once I start talking my brain goes out the window and I just start yapping.

Again, I really don’t mean to be the way I am. I’m just some sensitive person who freaks out whenever I even slightly feel like I’ve been wronged, when I feel like I’m right, when someone even gives me a minor insult… I don’t like being accused of things, lied about, being called names, and it’s a normal response because nobody likes being spoken to like that, and if they do it’s probably in bed or they’re just fucking mental.

I freak out too easily and for that, I am sorry.

[Wubbrle the Wubble]

@Namira said in I'm sorry if I'm on edge and rude today:

I freak out too easily and for that, I am sorry.

Nah it’s fine, I’m also having a day that’s a bit tough. I also freak out easily sometimes. I remember when I once freaked out over a single downvote and then overreacted in someone’s DM, and I apologized for it. It almost took me an entire day (yes) to forget abt it. and when I’m ill (just like now) then things hit harder to me, no matter what, if its bad, or unexpected (just like what happend earlier, I removed the downvote cuz I realized its harmless), or positive.

I feel like I’m a bit more stressed lately.

[A Former User]

@Namira

I’m just not going to bend to your will and be nicer because you asked me to

I’m glad you post this because it is a good reminder to people to not always expect everyone to be a nice kind person to them all the time. Behind the scenes, there’s stuff we dont see and for someone to deal with that and keep up the expectation to be nice and caring is not realistic. There obviously should be a little balance and people shouldnt just scream at everyone because that’s just how they feel lol. And some people might say that it’s not anyone’s job to consider these things in other people, but if people dont consider these things, people are just going to think you’re a bad person and take you personally. People need to do a better job at considering people’s feelings instead of ignoring it.

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In past history, people were always told be be pleasant to everyone they meet no matter what. It was socially unacceptable to be rude, even. That is kind of what I also used to preach to people because I thought that if everyone was “just kind to everyone,” this world would be a better place. It is more recently that I realized that I was wrong. And even though those people wont ever see this, I apologize. I completely ignored that negativity that impacts people. And what would make this world an actually better place isnt to ignore the bad but to actually start talking about it. I think this world has come a long way to reverse gaslighting people’s emotions, but we obviously have a lot more to do.

How someone is raised is the most important and most impactful thing in someone’s life in how someone’s personality is formed. How the people who’ve raised you think is how you will learn to think. So if someone you know is being a little bit of a jerk, maybe that is literally how they were raised. That isnt an excuse for making someone feel sad, it’s an explanation.