Insecurities.
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i can’t wear dresses without wearing stockings because of my knees
I can’t have my hair in a ponytail because of my big ears
I can’t be in public without smoothing my hair every five minutes because i’m afraid it’s too poofy or messy
I always am afraid i dress too ‘boyish’ just because pink isn’t my favorite color
I can’t play violin or sing in front of people without stalling because i’m afraid i’m not good enough and they’ll just lie and say i’m good so they don’t hurt my feelings
I’m afraid i’m always overwhelming to people then they don’t tell me untill they snap. then i feel horrible.
Being a girl is hard. Some people just don’t understand this and tell us to ‘suck up our bellies’ and wear makeup to hide our real face so the men will like it.
Men don’t understand boundaries. They always touch us weirdly and make innapropriate comments and do horrible things.
Let me fucking live my life how I want.
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@Enzi :( sorry to hear dat but i think ur bootyfull and perfect :>
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@Enzi
Honestly, embrace your hair. I mean, if it’s a little frizzy, I suggest using more conditioner and maybe put some at the root too if it’s a little frizzy up there. Frizziness can actually occur when you do smooth and play with your hair.Big ears are actually really cute. Especially kids, oh my goodness
There are plenty of feminine clothing that isnt pink.
I agree with the whole people just telling you what they think you want to hear to save your feelings. People try to make others feel good, but i think there’s a nice way to still make people feel good and be honest with them. Like with your violin, even if it’s not perfect, people can say something encouraging for you to practice and get even better instead of “Wow, you’re amazing” if you really arent all that great. Ive never heard your playing though. so i dont know lol. But I have heard you sing, and it really is amazing honestly. And I am not just saying that lol
I feel like if you are being a little much, people should just be up front for their sake and yours. If someone doesnt set boundaries, it is not like you’d know where they are and if you’re crossing them. I know some people rather not say something to save your feelings, but as you said, it would just make you feel horrible if they end up snapping at some point. I also know that it’s not a good feeling when you talk to someone not knowing that they are actually really annoyed. Makes you kind of not trust that person to be honest.
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@Enzi 1. I don’t know what this is referring to, but if it’s because your knees don’t look too good to the point you have to cover them up, I can understand that. I don’t know what it is, so I won’t comment on this too much.
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It’s totally fine to have a ponytail with big ears. You’re only 10 years old. If someone calls you ugly because of that, then there’s something with them. (Also, that’s alarming that you’re already having THIS much insecurity at that age).
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Again, there’s nothing wrong with hair like that. It might even look good.
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Like Duchess said, there’s other colors that look girlish that aren’t pink. There is also nothing really wrong with dressing up boyish. You can dress how you want to dress.
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This is normal. Feeling anxious infront of people is normal. Yes, people are perhaps saying that too not hurt your feelings and that’s fine, but they can also try to encourage you to practice more and become better. That could give you more confidence and be more trusting towards those people.
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Like I said, you’re 10 years old. Being overwhelming is normal, considering that fact. If people feel overwhelmed by you, they should probably tell you that they are. It would be more reassurring.
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Yes, that’s a nonsensical solution. There are better alternative than whatever that is those poeple suggested. Maybe tell trusted people about it. Also, people just in general (bad people) don’t understand boundaries. They don’t care about you, they most likely care only about theirselves if they think non-consensual touching and uncomfortable comments are okay.
All in all, none of these things are your fault. You BELIEVE it’s your fault. You see negative things happening because of you and feel like you’re responsible for those things. These occurences caused you to fear them and not want to repeat them again.
Correct me if I’m wrong about anything.
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i relate to frizzy hair, knees and ears
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@The4thFemC i’m scared of my knees caus
i got hairy legs
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@Enzi Thanks for making that clear. I’m not gonna tell you to shave them because I don’t want to tell people what to do, but I’m questioning one thing: How the hell do keep coming across these types of people? The people that think insulting a young girl is alright. Or maybe you’re afraid that people might insult you for things that aren’t that big of a problem? (Not disregarding your feelings, I’m just wondering.)
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@The4thFemC said in Insecurities.:
@Enzi Thanks for making that clear. I’m not gonna tell you to shave them because I don’t want to tell people what to do, but I’m questioning one thing: How the hell do keep coming across these types of people? The people that think insulting a young girl is alright. Or maybe you’re afraid that people might insult you for things that aren’t that big of a problem? (Not disregarding your feelings, I’m just wondering.)
yes and
i’m scared people’ll be like ‘ew that ten year old has hairy knees’
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@Enzi as someone with poofy hair i say to just let it be how it is
dont try and constantly smooth it cuz then itll just turn out worse