I think I'm starting to realize how clingy I am.
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Itโs the way I want constant reassurance, The way I crave attention more than I probably should, The way I feel almost needy just for someoneโs presence. And I hate it, because I donโt want to be โ too much โ for people. I donโt want them to see me as annoying or overwhelming. But at the same time, I canโt help it. I just want to be close, To be safe. To know that somebody wonโt leave me behind. Itโs exhausting. Being this self aware, But still not knowing how to stop. I just wish I could be " enough " without needing so much. I wish I could be easy to love. Easy to stay with, But Instead, I feel like Iam constantly fighting this hard part of myself that wants more. more. more. more. and more. It sounds like greed to the point where that sickens me. My clingyness sickens me, My greed sickens me, I sicken me. Itโs filthy. I donโt wanna keep draining people for my fuckery. It sickens me so much to see how horrible I am. And Itโs disgusting. Absolutely Disgusting and sickening.
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Iโm draining people, Because Iโm scared of my insecurities and scared to let somebody go. It hurts to see how many people I know leave me because of it. And itโs terrible. Iโm scared, And I donโt know what to do. Iโm really worried, Really scared. I donโt know how to fix this. I donโt know how to stop being this version of myself that feels like too much. All I know is that Iโm scared. Really scared.
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@PeteFromEltingville Iโm- not good at all at consoling but, you know tha iโm always there if you need someone to talk to :3
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@PeteFromEltingville Dontโ worry, me and everyone on here are all there for you :D
