finns poem thread (TW: dark topics)

finneass <33

now another one because I’m bored

finneass <33

this ones untitled but here

I can feel colors.
I can see sounds.
Am I crazy?

Or is it just the LSD kicking in?
The drugs to make my pain go away.
I can snort, smoke, and inject my pain away.

I don’t wanna feel anymore.
Feelings hurt.
They make me feel.

Just one more dose and I’ll be okay.

I’m sorry Mom.
I’m sorry Dad.
But remember,
I’m just a poor boy,
Who doesn’t deserve nor need your sympathy.

Maybe I’m still feeling things.

Another Dose.

finneass <33

Mine

I love him, don’t I?
He’s mine.
But is he?
Was he?

Was she better than I was?
What did I do wrong?
Then why’d you cheat on me baby?

Why was she yours too?
All I did was love you.
All I asked was you be mine.

I bet she asked the same thing too.

finneass <33

Infil-traitor

You infiltrate my mind
My words
My thoughts
My heart
My body.

Then you betray me.
With my mind
my words
my thoughts
my heart
my body.

I thought you loved me.
I thought you cared.
But did you?

Was I a pawn in your game of chess,
merely to get to the king you really wanted?

Did you ever love me?
Or was it all just a game?

Oh, I get it.
You’re an infil-traitor.
You infiltrate me.
Then you break me.
You double-cross me.
You make me feel worthless.

And I hope one day,
We never meet again.

finneass <33

i have a million of these, i wrote one yesterday

finneass <33

this ones a lil dark.

Burn

I like fire.
I play with it.
Run my fingers through it to feel the connection.

Flip the lighter open and the world disappears.
I burn.
But I love it.

The bright orange compliments my skin.
The red I see when I’m done means I love you.
The red means I’m okay.

It means that when the world burns,
I’ll stay.

I’ll watch the fire as it burns.
I’ll watch as it takes the world by storm.
As it makes me important again.
They’ll all remember me.
And I’ll remember them
As I smile at their demise.

finneass <33

the way i love you,
is unhealthy.
i treat you like a drug.
i need you,
without you i get irritable,
withotut you my heart hurts,
my head hurts.

the thing about drugs is
youre not the only one addicted to them.
youre not the only one that loves them.

theyre not just your drug.
but god sometimes you want them to be.
sometimes you dont want to share that high
that place of vulnerability.

but if you dont.
then its your fault.
you knew before you took them that they werent only yours.

and one day that drug will run out.
but not today.

finneass <33

I can’t name this one, nearly cried writing it so have fun <3

More than anything I want you to be okay
I want to watch you smile,
Hear your laugh
Feel your presence.

When you’re not okay it hurts me to watch
But I want you to know I’m here.
Because I love you,
And I know the pain you feel.

Because I feel it everyday.
I feel the pain of being surrounded
But being alone
Of being okay
But never really.

I want to pry,
But I won’t.

I want to share the pain you feel
To see you smile.
Because I love those late nights
Where we talked for hours.

Because you mean the world to me.
And I want you to know that.

Because forever with you, will never be long enough.
Because I love you with my whole heart.

With everything in me.
I just want to see you smile.
You mean the world to me darling.

We could talk if you wanted,
But never if you didn’t.

I know I talk a lot,
And I know I’m really random
And I know I’m a little crazy,
But I love that you deal with me.

finneass <33

another one from class bc im bored

I’ve suffered in silence.
Watched as he made you smile,
The way I wanted to.
Listen to your cries about how
He makes you happy,
Makes you smile.
How you love him.

What am I doing wrong?
Am I not good enough for you?
Am I not masculine enough?
Is my hair not long enough?
My smile not straight enough?
Do I talk too much?
Am I too boring?

Then why?
Why can’t I make you happy like he does.
Why can’t you smile at me,
The same way you do at him.

You were never mine,
But you were always mine.
I would never tell you how I felt,
But I would.

I would grab you by the shoulders and scream
About how I loved you.
How I always have.

But I can’t ruin what you have going on,
The happiness you feel.
So I hide it.
I suppress it.
And after I watch you smile I cry.
But at least you’re happy.

finneass <33

^ part two

But I’m not okay,
I promise.
But I’ll get there.
Maybe when you’re walking down the aisle.

I’ll smile.
Or maybe I’ll cry.
Or maybe I’ll wonder what we could’ve been.
If I wasn’t so selfless.

Maybe it’s okay to be selfish.

finneass <33

I wish I could smile,
for real this time.
I wish I could love,
for real this time.

But it’s hard to,
when all I feel is pain.
I physically can’t.
You stain my heart.

You stab me in the back,
And bandage the wound.

I thought you were my friend.
And maybe you loved me too.
And we’d be friends for life.
But maybe

Friends aren’t worth it.
Maybe I should be alone.

But then I’d cry.
Maybe this time I’d actually die.

finneass <33

Island

Sometimes islands,
Watch continents.
Jealous of that connection.
Wishing that they weren’t alone.

But they never have the courage to speak up.
And say “Hey! I wanna be included.”
And even when they are, they aren’t really there.
They exist in spirit.
But it’s not the same.

Sometimes,
Islands are just meant to be alone.
It’s okay to be an island.

One day you’ll learn
To love being alone,
To love your own company.
And other islands will come along,
and you’ll help each other.

You’ll learn to depend on yourself, one day
My little island.
You know how I know?
Because I’m an island too.

Goofbread🍌😸 · 4/27/22

finns poem thread (TW: dark topics)

Mine

Infil-traitor

Burn

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