lowkey sick of the ppl in my hs

A’Cappella Choir (the one I’m in) got invited to sing “Stand Up” from Harriet at the Black History Month Assembly yesterday.
So we accepted, naturally, and prepared the song. Mind you, A’Cappella is predominantly white. (Myself included.)
Our director, whom for safety I’ll call Mrs. V, doesn’t discriminate who gets solos for what, and the students enrolled in A’Cappella don’t, either.
I auditioned, because why not, along with a few other people.
Here’s who got the solos:
Me (the first one)
Omry (the middle one)
Leilani (the rest of them)
Omry and Leilani are wonderful singers.
Omry is one of our tenors, and Leilani is one of our sopranos.

We get to the performance in the assembly, the track is quiet, mics are having issues, which already throws me off on my solo. But almost as soon as I walk to the center from my place, I get booed at.
Booed at, while Omry didn’t even recieve any audience feedback, and Leilani got positive feedback.
It was just a general collection of negative things, and it really fucking upset me.
Yes, I understand that I was the only white person with a solo.
Yes, I understand that this was the Black History Month Assembly.
Yes, I understand that we sung Stand Up from Harriet, which is a movie about Harriet Tubman.

That shouldn’t mean anything.
It shouldn’t be about race.
Even if you took race out of the context of the song, it still has a powerful meaning that should speak to everyone.
But no, you had to make it about race.
But no, you had to make it about appearances.

I left that school almost immediately after that performance.
I didn’t want to face anyone in the hallways.
I helped put some things away, and then left.
I didn’t feel safe crying in the school.
I didn’t feel safe crying outside.
I didn’t feel safe crying on the bus.
I held it in for nearly 45 minutes, until I got home, where I immediately told my mom what happened and fucking sobbed.
That is the first time anything like that has happened to me.
So now, here I sit, at home, writing this stupid fucking vent, because I have nothing better to do, because now I doubt my capabilities and talent.

I’m done.
I’m sick of this fucking school.

walls

𖤐𝐸𝓂𝒾𝓁𝓎 𝑀𝑒𝓇𝓇𝒾𝓂𝒶𝒸𝓀𖤐

so they’re judging you based off your skin color??

if you need me to kick their shins just hit me up bro im free

@beautiful-princess-disorder pretty much, yeah. And it really fucking hurt, so like…fml.
I’m done.
I am so fucking sick and tired of this school-

walls

𖤐𝐸𝓂𝒾𝓁𝓎 𝑀𝑒𝓇𝓇𝒾𝓂𝒶𝒸𝓀𖤐 what the fuck? ew.

@beautiful-princess-disorder yeah. I legit had to wait nearly an hour before I felt safe to cry, because I thought people would recognize me, so I waited with my fucking hood up, just to feel safe.

walls

𖤐𝐸𝓂𝒾𝓁𝓎 𝑀𝑒𝓇𝓇𝒾𝓂𝒶𝒸𝓀𖤐 oh wow. im sorry. if you need to rant im here <3 /p

@beautiful-princess-disorder it’s all good. Honestly, I got my rant out, and I talked to my bf on call about it, and- honestly, it’ll probably just resolve itself over time, but it’s gonna hurt for a while.

walls

𖤐𝐸𝓂𝒾𝓁𝓎 𝑀𝑒𝓇𝓇𝒾𝓂𝒶𝒸𝓀𖤐 alrighty

i really do hope you feel better. that shit sucks.

@beautiful-princess-disorder yeah. just genuinely sick of this fucking hs tho

lowkey sick of the ppl in my hs

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