my favorite color is red. [tw]

[your_search_history_scares_me]

I think the color is beautiful. Hypnotizing.

Light red’s fine, but i’ve always prefered my red deep.

maybe that’s why i cut myself. The pretty colors seeping out of my skin in clean cuts distracts me from my stress for a moment. it feels like a prize. but if i cut too deep, i don’t stop bleeding for a while, and that’s bad.

I haven’t relapsed in a few weeks.

the scars are fading. i need new ones.

the thoughts are coming back. more frequent.

it’s not like i’m trying to quit. I can’t. I could if i wanted to, but it’s my cry for help. my sick cry for help. i need someone to see. anyone. and realize how much i’m hurting.

i’m broken, and i’ve learned to accept that.

i forgot to state, but i do not want/expect any sort of pity/comfort. i just- wanted to get it out.

[soverignwoverign12309]

oh yeah I agr- oh.

I suggest cutting food like kiwi and eating them, y’ know, into little thin slices, and please, do not use scars for fashion, my way of putting it

[your_search_history_scares_me]

i don’t use my scars for fashion. never. my self harm is a coping mechanism. ONE of the reasons i do it is a cry for help.

i dont feel comfortable diving into all the reasons i cut myself, but a kiwi wouldn’t help like you think it would.