Y'all I just want answers ngl. (Sorta vent..? Idk really(
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I’ve been- thinking about my mental issues. Disorders, health issues, all that. My parents are neurodivergent, completely. And idk I just want an answer because- I know for sure I’m not normal. I don’t think normally, I don’t act normally. Or at least I’m not 100% all there. And I know this. I know that I am neurodivergent as well. But I wish I had an answer as to what I have. I seem to switch to a baby-ish personality when I’m really happy. I’m gonna talk about some things from my childhood, TW: disturbing/odd topics.
When I was little, up until present day, I was hypersexual. I’ve been hypersexual. When I was little I would switch from hypersexual to a baby. I used to crave attention and a different kind of feeling, and I would often find myself doing- adult like things. Monkey see monkey do, mirroring everyone. Mirroring my world. But I felt smarter and more mature than my peers or my brothers. I had this thing where I wasn’t ready to grow out of it, and from time to time I’ll switch to a childish silly personality. I find myself doing it a lot and it’s hard not to do in school. Whenever it’s in school I’m just quiet. Now this is very obviously some sort of mental disorder and I wish I had an answer. I have gender dysphoria, very obviously depression, very obviously anxiety, possibly PCOS, possibly PTSD, possibly autism, and very likely ADD or ADHD. I’m not diagnosing myself, I’m just- very sure that this is what I have from the research I’ve done and me just trying to label what I have do it’s easier to understand myself. I have a hard time understanding some things and would often have times of extreme mental breakdowns where I’m confused, numb, I can’t understand anyone, I can’t focus or concentrate, and my mind is fuzzy and I need help on clarity and I can’t function correctly. I have tics,.a chewing habit, nail biting habit, I find myself copying some things other people do, zoning off and daydreaming constantly, and constantly overwhelmed or quiet. It’s hard and I want answers, but it’s hard to get a diagnoses when they cost thousands of dollars and plus we can’t even find me a psychiatrist.
Idk just a small vent I guess.
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I have a language I call “silly-language” it’s where I basically talk and act like a child. I talk all weird and silly, add z’s to the ends of my words, have zoomies and have happy sparks. And I feel ashamed when I act so needy and baby ish but I can’t help it
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Also I might be bipolar. I’m not sure. I want diagnoses’ man. ;_; this shit is rough and I’d like to take medication so this way it’s easier
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I fr wanna know why people who can talk about this with Cyx aren’t, I sure as hell can’t, can y’all get the fuck over here?
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And dad, don’t be ashamed, that’s literally adorable
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@Hexed-To-Death I honestly get that and i mean the reason i do it is from PTSD
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@Sen it’s fine really, I didn’t really expect any help on this
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@Sen and nuh uh ☝🏽☝🏽☝🏽
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Also this is kinda what I mean
(I changed my mind and the image is now deleted)
In these texts, in real life I am feeling some sort of zoomies or like an excessive happiness or high and it drives me to talk or act like this or smile a lot and don’t judge me now but this is just how I talk sometimes. It’s a thing where I get so embarrassed at school if I do anything related to that kinda- attitude or persona. I often get tics from it and cover my face or I curl into a ball and that kinda thing is embarrassing to do in school.
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it could be age regression, i do it and tend to go into littlespace when im sleepy or when im sad sometimes, it only happens when im happy sometimes, from what you’ve said it seems like it could be
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@Hexed-To-Death if im correct it just means u want to be a child again and thus your subconscious has u act like one sometimes in a desprate attempt to return to that simpler time 🤓🤓
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@Sen I already talked to them about it.
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@Xentou-セロ the word “already” would’ve counted if it was before 2 days ago
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@Sen He had told me on the day he posted this. He asked for me to get on fourms and look but I said I could not look at the moment. So they just told me on mpp so we talked about it.
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@Cyx Don’t feel ashamed, It makes me happy when I hear some of your silly words like How you call your doggos. I love your silliez billiez
