I don't feel real right now. I am aware of a lot of things in my body and around me I shouldn't be.

[Your Local Shadow Simp]

My body doesn’t feel like itself. I can feel the space between my bones, specifically those in my fingers and toes. This causes me to feel my muscles, fat, and everything around it. Feeling that makes me feel my skin. I don’t like the way it feels. I often feel like I want to peel it all off via scratching or picking. My breathing doesn’t feel right. I have to manually breathe sometimes, and I can’t get it to go back to normal for a long time. For those of you who don’t understand, it’s like when you wear uncomfortable rings and then you have to adjust them or take them off, and then you forget what your fingers touching feels like, and it feels weird.

When I get hot, I get itchy. I hate getting itchy. If I don’t stop itching, I will scratch my skin into Oblivion. I have dermographism, which is a ‘skin writing’ mutation, so if I scratch myself hard enough, I’ll leave welts on my skin that will stay for as long as 30 minutes to 2+ hours. I’ll also start to break the skin and it’ll turn red. Any more and I would break the skin and it would start bleeding and pussing lightly. Besides, when I don’t itch my skin, I get these little red dots that look like a rash.

My sight feels blurred and lagged some days, and I don’t understand. It’s like when you put a filter on a video, and it makes it feel like it’s motion blurred. I can’t fix it. I just have to deal with it.

I feel like I can also hear things more but also less as of late. I can hear the electricity charge surge when I plug something into an outlet. I can hear people breathing. I can hear lights buzzing, even if other people can’t. I hate the sound of Styrofoam. I hate the sound of nail files being used–this is why I clip or bite my nails. I also hate having to brush my hair dry–the sound my hair and hairbrush make is horrid.
On the other hand, when I’m talking to people, their words sound so blurred and muffled together. I ask them to repeat what they had said, and it’s just the same. I try so hard to figure out what they’re saying, but it’s frustrating and just pisses me off. Speaking of sounds, there are certain sounds like high-pitched ringing and the sound of a very specific fabric rubbing together that just make the back of my neck tingle uncomfortably.

I also simply can’t stand some materials–I HATE crushed velvet. It makes me feel my skin. So does sherpa and fleece. (Like the chunky fleece, not the stuff used on fleece throw blankets. That’s a safe material.) Or the material used in heavy cotton blend T-shirts? No go. The sharp tags on Gildan brand T-shirts are also a major nope. Hoodie linings are safe, and most materials are good, but some just make me feel certain ways that I don’t like, and I just- hgfj- There’s not a way to describe it.

People tell me that I’m overreacting and that I just want attention, and I’m fucking done. Why can’t people understand? Like my mom–I’ve told her about the fabric noise and what it does, and she calls me crazy and weird. I can’t control what my body does. I wish I could.
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No, never mind. I don’t want that. That would be a living hell. Then again, so is nearly everything. Fuck my life.

[Wubbrle the Wubble...]

@just-a-fkn-reaper-3-0 I read all of it and i gotta say that-

Well, that sounds a bit from a horror movie- I hope you will feel better tho

[Cameron]

@just-a-fkn-reaper-3-0 I didnt deserve this, you got me fucked up

[JDP_Random]

@just-a-fkn-reaper-3-0
I really felt that one about hearing things, literally all that is true about me too fr. I can hear outlets and electrical units, which is mad weird, but I guess we may just hear higher frequencies than others.

But the only reason I have to have people keep repeating things is because one, ADHD, and kind of bad hearing mixed with autism, like bro these diagnosises got me disabled, but I learned to live with it after a while.

[Your Local Shadow Simp]

JDP_Random I’m honestly glad I’m not the only one, because this shit is annoying as hell. The things like the fabrics and hearing is all the time, but like- bones- skin- muscles. Those don’t happen all the time-

[Your Local Shadow Simp]

Wubbrle the Wubble... It sometimes feels like a horror movie, Wubb. It’s not fair lmao

[Your Local Shadow Simp]

Cameron Sorry broski- But that’s just the truth- :"D

[Your Local Shadow Simp]

@just-a-fkn-reaper-3-0 Oh and also, things like braces (the compression braces especially) with the elastic?? H E L L. And unfortunately for me, I have a jammed toe, so I have to wear one FOR THE NEXT 2-6 FUCKING WEEKS GRAHHHHHH

[A Former User]

@Your-Local-Reaper This happens to me way too often-

[ᴛʀᴇᴠᴏʀ]

Did you eat my grandma or something?

[A Former User]

I dunno why that happens actually it feels like that every day for me

[A Former User]

@BlueSpeed tf.

[ᴛʀᴇᴠᴏʀ]

@PopTart_Yeeter My bad

[A Former User]

@BlueSpeed Hold the fuck up why is your name Cum

[Your Local Shadow Simp]

@Bandit i just noticed that

[A Former User]

@Bandit Real

[ᴛʀᴇᴠᴏʀ]

This post is deleted!

[A Former User]

I SAW THAT @Bandit COME HITHER

[ᴛʀᴇᴠᴏʀ]

@PopTart_Yeeter AAAAAAA-

[Your Local Shadow Simp]

@PopTart_Yeeter I mISSED IT WHAT DID THEy SAY-]